Just have to admit this.....

Right on! I understand, and can stand there in that crowd of not feeling “Oneness” but knowing it is so… For years I worked in food industry, I was surrounded by people, wanting and needing, than I would attend AA meetings where people where seeking healing and I experienced the same feelings of grow up… and decided I did not like people either… I still needed grow spiritually and I still need to grow spiritually! as we all do or we would not be here in this realm having this experience at this time. There is nothing good or bad about your not wanting to be with people you abhor. It is just a recognition of where you are at this moment… 
I am Love Jeff

I hear you on this, Janet. I sometimes think that there's a difference between feeling that we're all part of the bigger oneness and that we're “at one with” other people. I think you can do the former without taking on the energy of the latter….it might be possible to let the edges of our auras acknowledge each other/connect without actually letting yucky ju ju in. I think. :)

Feelings matter; don't doubt that.

There's a lot of misconceptions about non-judgment from all that I have seen; in the midst of it aren't we judging ourselves for an emotion that naturally emerges when our system records distaste in response to a stimulus? That's how I see it anyway.

Suffering the company or presence of an obnoxious or miserable person has never been proven to be useful, barring teaching 'self' patience.

But in terms of being ecstatically happy? Accepting them and yourself as perhaps incompatible, then moving on, has always worked from all I hear :)

Just thought I'd throw in that bit… I've been having my own 'revelations' on this recently.

Good luck, love!

Sherri

Janet,

The song is one of my favorites of that genre. It stands alone but is further highlighted by your “Process” and the additional puzzle pieces to make a coherent and dynamic statement.

As you said in another comment here on Lisa's blog; about the theory that the Universe abhors a vacuum, which as Jessica pointed out, was brilliant.

I chose to take the middle path and am in harmony with Lisa and Sherrilene. I abhor the negative juju but still am drawn to it, which explains my reaction and action.

This little thing below just keeps popping up in my head so I figure the Universe must want me to post it, but I don't know why?
You can not make a snake shed it's skin until it's ready.

Namaste'
~lars

do you think there's such a thing as knowing when you become enlightened. Me, I think that's like juju on you to even want to seek it out. It's too much like a job, seperating this from that.like in a factory. But, I do like the fact that a buzzer goes off and bingo, it's time to play. Happy hour.

Morning Star and I had a long phone conversation about Oneness and diversity this afternoon.  There are so many ways to think about things, so many subtle ways to explore this whole discussion.  By the time it was over, we were into visual images and continuums and possible future blogs.  She pointed me over to your blog, Janet.  And the only thing I can add is that it seems good to explore this, and to go deeply into it, and to discover what it means to each person.  Because, as we keep talking to each other, we're learning more each day.  We're getting at least a little bit more enlightened, hmmmm?  Maybe not the “big bang”, but we're expanding awareness. 

janet, look down at your feet…you are right where you are suppose to be…lol

much love and joy dear one…your honesty is your open door…*

The Lakota taught me about what some call an aura and some call boundaries.  They taught that we each have a circle around us though we are all connected(Mitakuye Oyasin) our individual circles are just that: individual; and we all all connected does not mean we should dissolve our personal boundaries.

Now, I'm not Lakota but I enjoy learning about various cultures, spiritual beliefs, theories and religous practices.  The similarities of the core/essence are there.

The Lakota explain we can choose who let into our circles/auras and that it is healthy to have a circle, not walking around dissolving our circles and leaving ourselves open to anything that comes, feels like having access.  During the month on the mountain I spent with them, there was a newcomer from one of the reservations, who had been kicked out for a violent crime.  One of the members of the group I was invited to join felt sorry for this gentleman and invited him.

The spiritual leader gathered all together to explain while we had compassion for this person and his humanity we should take care to remember our circles (I regret cannot remember the Lakota language for the word for this personal circle).  That we alone chose who to allow into our circles, that we should not intrude upon another's circle and that we all are all connected was a very deep level did not mean we should be circle/aura/boundryless.  This newcomer was welcomed and invited to particpate in all of the activities during that month.

However, half-way through the month he was expelled.  He was unable to respect others' circles and committed the same violent crime upon one of his sympathizers; a grand-daughter to the spiritual man who had invited us all.  No punishment or retribution was exacted upon the offender; he was simply asked to leave.  The thinking was that being asked to leave, he would have the solitude to examine his actions and the incentive being the pain of being asked to leave.

The spiritual leader explained to some who still sympathized with the offender that expelling him might seem harsh, but what about the harshness of those who'd been attacked?  He explained to all that the energies and compassion should be directed toward those respecting their own and others' circles.  

I asked about the we are all connected matter and he said this was true, that we are all connected but those who chose not to walk the Red Road made a choice of their own and only by our tough love (he used a Lakota word) could we help the offender see his ways, and thus, return to the healthy, loving fold of people.

All that to say :) that we are all connected.  But that does not mean we have to invite ill parts of the connectedness into our closer, personal spaces.  Those ill parts can be treated and restored to health.  Each of us, still, has free will.

I loved your entry :) 

[If this is too long for here, feel free to remove :)]

Janet, great blog, great discussion. The duality of this world pitted against the oneness that we all are/have at heart, that we struggle toward even if we don't always act like it or even necessarily know it. I love this insight of yours:

it really is all about the willingness to heal my own inner divisions and find radical self-acceptance.

That's the conclusion I come to again and again, that before I can achieve “one” with the world, I must be at one with myself. And my interactions with others in the world vis a vis the practice of love, peace, acceptance, etc. will always reflect the “state of the nation” as regards myself. They show me where I haven't got it yet.

Yes, I see that I'm not there yet, and all that is, is just another opportunity for me to accept myself.

As for coming out to play, isn't that what we're all doing here? In a manner of speaking.

Not thinking about it too much, but Brother Jesus said something useful about this: Love others as you love yourself. So my first love is that ONE at the center of my medicine wheel. When that One is loved well enough, it is natural to love others, aka my neighbors. I don't see that it means I have to like them or hang out with them or put up with their nonsense, stupidity, cruelty or politics.

We are at play in the field of form, where diversity and duality provide the Juice. Oneness is true, but overrated while we are here. Enlightenment drives us to the Center of our wheel, then supernovas it to See the Oneness in the diversity. But We still chop wood, carry water, take out the trash, and get rubbed the wrong way by all those annoying differentiated Divine beings we are one with.

When the Dalai Lama announced on MSNBC this summer that he loved George Bush, what was he really saying? I am still studying on that one.

Janet, your honesty and feelings about this reminds me so much of when I was a little girl and I used to ask my mother if I had to be around people I didnt like in heaven.  When she said yes I stated quite clearly that being around people I didnt care for really didnt sound like heaven to me.  So I feel you on this one! 
I so applaud your honesty, openness and ability to be this vulnerable and raw in this blog.  I personally think the world needs a lot more of that.  Diving into these types of feeling and subjects really bring forth a lot more compassion for others, ourselves and a deeper understanding of the One and what we all share…even in our woundedness…we share that too.
You are a beautiful person Janet and this personally just makes me love you more.  I love brave people willing to go out on a limb and just say whats on their mind…even if it isnt something thats always on the list of things we feel safe enough to say. for ourselves  I love you my friend!

I think we all know on a subconscious level just where we are going and what we are supposed to be doing.  The conscious level lives with reality on a day to day basis and what it comes down to as that no matter how much love, light, and teaching we go through… we're always going to be human.  Your honesty is refreshing!  Reality and the subconscious make us who we are!  There's no need to “keep it separated”  ………!

so many have already replied to your post, many words of wisom. 

In my mind, perhaps the blocking out of that which you now find uncomfortable is allowing you the time and space in which to deal with these reasons.

In a similar manner - A while back I broke away (didnt partake in anything to do with them)from my external family (those not living with me), for 10 months - following that i am now in a place where I feel omfortable being in their presence - and believe it or not - share an even greater relationship with my grandmother - her years of wisdom somehow now click - but I now know why that is!

That's not to say that all the relationships turn out for better - there are simply some people on this planet who are motivated in life by the negative.

Take care

Janet…I was swimming around and stumbled across your blog.  It is comforting to know that I am not alone.  I feel as though I am amongst spiritual giants…it can be intimidating…nice to know that we all have a few cracks…I mean that in the nicest of ways.  Sometimes I feel as though the path to enlightenment is just that, a path…as a human being I am always reaching, always growing, ever evolving….I may not be fully enlightened until my spirit no longer dwells in this body…kind of like people who speak in tounges, there is nothing wrong with that.  If the spirit slapped that gift on me that would be great, but, I've heard people brag about receiving that gift, and I swear that they were speaking spanish.  I'm trying to make sense…hold on.  I would love to have perfect spiritual peace and enlightenment right now, but, that's on missy's time table….God did not wake up and want to be missy today.  If I focus on not having it right now, I get really screwed up….my path and growth are stunted.  I too abhor bad juju….I lived there for soooo long that now I run, duck and cover…its hard for me.  I do not think that I am better than, I just do not want any, thank you very much!  All I can do is keep going forward, keep breathing, keep believing, keep growing….I have to go through my heart felt failures to continue on this path…the failures, after having gone through them, make me stronger and maybe just a wee bit closer to the enlightenment I seek…..man, I hope I made sense….my brain has been having a hard time connecting with my words!!!

hi Janet - thanks for your reply - however dont get me wrong - these people arent negative - they are simply motivated by the negative - by desire, by an ego…. they too have the potential to view things differently….and may one day be better for it - along with all around them. After all, we all have to start somewhere!~

I think the best is to accept and express and share real feelings and thoughts, the only way that works for me. 
To pretend to be another one is at least a waste of time and can be destructive too. I guess there is a general obssession about love that rapes its real meaning.
Anyone needs others  trying to love them, this is even insulting, people deserve respect, this is share real feelings, false ones suck.

Please, to everybody, respect yourselves and respect me, never try to love me, I only love truth.

Janet,

I was just commenting to Morningstar recently that the concept of “We are ALL one” is a misconception or incomplete concept.  We are all of ONE planet, Earth, at least for the current time, until some of us come to be born on other planets.  We are ALL manifestated of ONE life force and connected - due to that.  BUT we are individuations of the ONE consciousness.  We are NOT all the same.  Perhaps, that is why you feel as you described in your blog.

I have not read any of the attached comments, yet, but I do disagree with you on one point.  None are less than you.  They can be not the same.  You may not want to recognize any of those “undesirable” traits in yourself and that is a valid choice.  That is how you know what your “individuation” IS.

Things just “happen” for our personal growth and development.  While in an earthly, human sense, mutual consensus arrives at “good” and “bad” for the sustenance of peace and harmony within society (hopefully, at least), experiences are neither (bad or good) from the soul's perspective.  They are for reflection, learning and an expansion of what we perceive of as reality.

BTW I hate to be the one to “break” it to you but there is no where to arrive at.  It is ALL a journey.  Enjoy it - even the bad stuff is an opportunity for the next best thing in your life to arise.  If you do “arrive” at a personal destination, it is a temporary point on a chart of your path, and if you are too attached to that, there will be much disappointment but the journey itself never disappoints - it can not - it simple IS, whatever it is.  Good and Bad.

Wishing you radical self-acceptance, much compassion all around and the fun of coming out to play …I'll be watching for you.

Deborah

Janet,

Neither am I free in the way you describe.  We all do the best we can with what we know.

I should have known from your post that you did know.  Thanks for making that clear.

Thanks for the clarity today.

Deborah

Sometimes it's hard for us to remember that everyone is our equal, they just need healing themselves to remember who they really are.

mommy???

Janet, I haven't read all the comments here, but I have read your blog, and I hear you.  I confess that I have been feeling in a similar way these last few weeks, and I've been trying to work through these feelings.

Wow, I should have read the comments.  I was missing out on a lot.  Glad I did, and I have some deeper responses now.
@Tiger - 
Just wanted to let you know that my grandfather was born on Pine Ridge Reservation, and I've been deeply interested in the Lakota ways.  Your story on Janet's blog about “feeling the oneness” was remarkable.
Someone I called my best friend for a long time was causing me a lot of grief.  Someone I respected, and always looked up to.  We ended up crossing harsh words, when he felt that I respected the teachings of another more than his, and he became jealous.  This is reaffirming my descision to not talk to him till he thinks about what he's done and says the proper things.
I feel no hate towards him, and I realize he has been living a hard life of late, but I'm also realizing this hard life might be his karma trying to teach him a lesson.  I am in the middle of deep lessons myself, trying to restore my balance, and I need to not only have others respect my boundries, but to be positive influences as well.  As I am learning more and more, and is getting ingrained more deeply into my thought patterns…  self healing comes before we can heal others.  Perhaps, at least of the difficult sort.
There are other friends who have been going through troubled times, but they do not treat me negatively over something so trivial, and respect their boundries.  These friends I find I have no difficulty finding the right words to send love to them with, and nor do I feel like I am being attacked for it.
I am glad I got to read your response.  =)
@Janet  -  Greetings!  Nice to meet you as well.  I apologize for my brief and impersonal post, as I stated before, I read only the original blog, and none of the comments till now.  I'm still getting used to the open community sort of thing here at Gaia, although I think I'm getting better at it.  =D  I'm also learning, like you are, to balance, “Kyle time,” and “God time.”  I've been trying to clean my room all day, after cleaning half of it yesterday, but I've been realizing I need to get into a routine, and not only sort my environment and mind, but my time as well.  =)
@Debby - Sheesh, there sure is a lotta that readin' stuff here on this site.  =P  I think I just spent like…  2 hours reading through 2 threads/blogs.  Hahahaha!  I'm enjoying it though.  =D

Greetings, Frost.  I have been to Pine Ridge…  The month on the remote mountain was people from Pine Ridge and Rose Bud, who invited several friends from the Apache community in S. CO and a few from Kansas and Oklahoma nations.  Though I am not Native American, I was approached seemingly from out of the blue when I lived in Kansas, by the spiritual leader who then invited me to the sacred ceremony.  I knew nothing about such ceremonies prior to attending and felt incredibly honored to be invited, as thus. 

We were on the remote mountain for a month in order to prepare for the SD ceremony far from what is known at least in this area as wannabes who sensationalize such things.  It was the second most sacred ceremony, the first being the GD…  I was then invited to Pine Ridge, where I realize my experience and invitations were incredible honors by the community.  It was not something I sought, or even had prior knowledge of having existed.  

I was open about having little to no knowledge about such things.  The spiritual leader said it made no difference, he had “seen” me long before we met.  It was the most incredible month, as you can imagine.  So was my Pine Ridge visit.

It would be my honor to talk via email here, if you like.  Much, as you know, cannot be discussed openly and I will respect those traditions :)  Glad to meet you!  Washte, my friend.

Janet - I hope you don't mind this little tangent on your entry!  If so, just holler :)

janet i think i'm temporarily all peed out now ty :D

Thank you, Janet!  big smile :)

Washte.  =)

Did I hear someone say Rosebud?  

Crouching Tiger, were you calling for your Rosebud-dy? Look no further, here I am! I must say that I absolutely love your response to this sacred blog, and I shall send you an invitation to be my friend in a few minutes' time! The Lakota hold a very special place in my heart too!  

Speaking of hearts, hello my dear Jan-HEART!!!  

Gosh, what an awe-inspiring picture - it must be a butt-HER-fly!!! :-)  

Well, as synchronicity would have it, I posted a blog entitled 'Enligten-WOMEN-t' a few days ago, so I guess great minds really do think alike! ;-)  

I have attracted a 'gentleman' into my life who is the polar opposite of me, gulp! However, this relationship has turned out to be a life-altering blessing, for every time I encounter this person, I am graced with the ONE-derful opportunity of seeing through his ego, and remembering his divine essence and connection to Source. In fact, my friendship with him has helped me to understand why I must have chosen a certain soul to be my mother!  

I second precious JEWEL-ia's comment and would like to thank you, with all my heart, for expressing your feelings so honestly. You lead by example, my dear
Jan-HEART, and I pray that someday I shall have the courage to bare my soul in my blogs too!   

All my love,
your Rosebud-dy -,-'-{@